I'm feeling more in control and more mindful about what I'm putting into my body> plus I'm not feeling so overwhelmed about where life is going and how I'm going to deal with these bumps in the road.
I've adopted a "fake it, til' you make it" attitude in regards to so many things in my life. in terms of weight loss, I'm faking being a skinny person who doesn't have food issues in the hopes that it'll turn into a reality. In terms of studying/jobs, I'll fake being the smart, put-together pre-medical student who is ambitious,driven and self-assured until I get all the way to becoming a doctor. I am not as self-confident or self-assured as I look and this fake it attitude will definitely help me get there. In terms of relationship I try to be so secure, honest, trusting and self-assured. Most of my doubts in a relationship relate to me: am i pretty enough, will he love me enough, do i interest him enough---I know on a concious level that I am pretty enough, he does love me and I do interest him but on a subconcious level related to that fat girl in the last couple posts I showed, I believe I'm not good enough or worth it. So I try to fake being these things and within that act, grows a reality that I am those things.
So I'll post pictures of my boyfriend's trip when I get home but for now, this is my update.
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